Celebrating Dad

My father, Tim Rahmn passed away July 1st, 2007. Following are the comments I made at the memorial held in his honor in Skagway, Alaska. - michael rahmn

There is a quote I ran across about a month ago that resonated with me - I think is appropriate here:

“Many people say that what we are all seeking is a meaning for life… I think that what we are really seeking is an experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on the purely physical plane will have resonance within our innermost being and reality, so that we can actually feel the rapture of being alive…” -Joseph Campbell

Although my dad would have made fun of my ‘fancy book learnin’ if I would have said that to him, I think that he was one to constantly seek new ways to experience being alive.

He was a painter, musician, wood carver, plumber, carpenter, electrician and pilot. He rebuilt airplanes from the ground up, was a radio technician, stained glass artisan, photographer, firefighter, emergency medical technician, mechanic, commercial driver, scuba diver, teacher, a proud father and grandfather and an amazingly loving and dedicated husband.

While my mom expects straight A’s of herself, my dad was content at C+/B-. He was happy to be doing, to get something done, and to try something new. You can imagine who we showed our report cards to first.

He was so proud of us kids for participating in whatever opportunities were presented to us. So, even though my sister needed a separate room in the house for all her sports medals and trophies, I knew my Dad was extremely proud of me for receiving a “Certificate of Participation”.

I knew it because he *told* me many times how great it was that I tried. “you know, he’d say, Not everyone can run 12 minute mile…”

Really, he never said that but he did tell us *every* time we did something how proud he was that we were out there doing it.

I didn’t realize how great a strength this was of his until reflecting back on his life this week — but I think it was at the core of who he was… If something needed to be done, you just do it. Just get started. Have the inner-confidence to know you’ll figure out how to finish what you’ve started.

And he was perfectly happy taking us along for the ride. A quick sample of some of the things we did with my dad:

• before 6 - cross-country skiing, snowshoeing, ice skating, camping, hiking, blueberry picking, fishing and of course, flying

• @8 - when he took up oil painting and wood carving I asked if I could do it too. Not only did he patiently teach me how to paint a fir tree, he promptly handed me a box full of sharp carving knives and a block of wood

• @12 we raced dogs as a family, built and sold dogsleds, and learned emergency medicine (although i’m not sure if we went to those classes because my parents wanted us to learn CPR, or they were just short an Annie doll and needed someone to practice on). We had about 40 sled dogs then and my dad got a 3-family subsistence permit to put a fish wheel on the Copper River. And of course he volunteered to build it. So at 13, we had our own slime-line going in our front yard in Glennallen. He was never hesitant to invite us into his latest passion.

• @14 - construction: a garage and a couple additions to the house. and

• @16 I think he was more excited than I was when I bought my first car ’cause it was something else mechanical he could take apart and put back together. We were camping last weekend and as my kids were having a blast climbing on the rocks and playing in the dirt my dad was constantly on my mind. He left me a burning desire to weave a trail of memories for my children as powerful as the ones he left me.

Dad grew up in North Hollywood CA - His father and grandfather were professional photographers with the studios and until my parents moved to Nome in 1970, he had never lived anywhere else. That was supposed to be a 1 year adventure. 37 years later via Nome, Fairbanks, Anchorage, Homer, Glennallen, Fairbanks and for the last 10 years Skagway here we are. Skagway was also to be a 1 year adventure. Each year it was the same - “this will be our last season”… He talked about coming back for the money, but I know he loved this land and he loved this community and I’m truly grateful that these last few months he was the happiest he’s every been doing something he loved.

There is no greater gift you can give your children than unabated and unconditional love of your spouse. In this area, my dad *was* an A+ student… And as my mom will tell you, she never stopped trying to teach him.

Although I think no man should have to visit as many scrap booking stores as he did, he did it. He grumbled, but he always supported Mom’s needs, desires, interests and hobbies with even more passion and support than he had for his own.

He put Mom first and loved her with all his heart. Cindy and I couldn’t have asked for a better relationship to model our own marriages after.

and Cindy paid dad the ultimate compliment by marrying someone just like him.

Our family is completely blown away by the support from this community of friends. We thank you sooo much for you love and support and my sister and I know we are leaving my mom in good hands.

There is so much more I could say and still not do his life justice so I’ll leave you with this:

• Express sincere gratitude — My dad was a big fan of giving a heartfelt thank you

• Seek the experience of being alive. If what you are doing no longer turns your crank, do something else or add another hobby

• And most important of all: Love your family with every ounce of your being